One woman’s journey to her destination on the harrowing streets of TO.
N.J., Contributor
Walking the streets of Toronto is not for the faint of heart, especially when faced with the moral tests that are brought by the bothersome tendencies of this city’s inhabitants. These frustrating acts are a sure way to both boil my blood and disintegrate some brain cells. With much love I present my issues with the bad behaviour of Torontonians:
1. Get off your phone.
While walking through a crowded Queen’s Park as we all rush to class, why do you think this is an appropriate time to be texting every person you’ve ever encountered and their mother?
Get your face off the screen, watch where you are going, and pick up the pace. Or else you might be flattened by one of the city’s cyclists or vespa drivers, and I can’t say myself or any onlookers will be particularly empathetic about it.
2. Cyclists
Dear entitled people pedaling through the streets, fun fact: you still must obey the traffic laws even if you are in the bike lane! Red ALWAYS (other than a few technicalities) means stop. Whether you have two pedals or four, come to a pause.
Sincerely,
Someone who thinks you might just need a license to ride a bike.
3. PDA
“Ew, unless you have a smooch for me, unlock those lips!” – A frustrated, lonely, tired, overworked, sad, woman. Save your affection for two places, the bedroom or if you’re the adventurous type, a secluded rooftop. Not Robarts. Never Robarts. Stop hooking up at Robarts.
4. Those who march to the beat of their own drum
Ever been late and you’re really walking fast trying to make it to at least a portion of the lecture and out of nowhere emerges the not only slowest, but least predictable walker. They can’t stick to the right or left side of the sidewalk, maybe they’re on their phone or they’re looking at the sky, but whatever their prerogative is, it’s in my way. #4 goes out to the people that are always in somebody’s way. Move over.
5. “Speakerheads”
Oh wow, you’re listening to the Weekend!? I had no idea, the fact that it is blasting out of a speaker in your backpack gave me no hints at all! Just please, wait until you are not in public to listen to music if you don’t have headphones, or at least turn it down below the absolute loudest volume.
As a nice little wrap up disclaimer if you do any of these things please don’t be offended. I am sure you are a lovely person with plenty of friends and a good GPA. You can still overcome these little quirks, I swear. you just need a little support from your loved ones, and don’t worry there won’t be a riot of St. Mikes students outside your door if you don’t overcome them (SMCSU can’t afford pitchforks after last year’s audit found out they were using them for LARP-ing) (shout out SMCSU).
Photo Credit: Aiden Fung
